


rage against the dying of the light

by coffins



Series: the sun and the birds [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Atsumu Character Study, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Miya Atsumu-centric, Vignette, i think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:00:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24590461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffins/pseuds/coffins
Summary: a series of vignettes showcasing hinata shouyou's fall into miya atsumu's arms
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Miya Atsumu
Series: the sun and the birds [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1777525
Comments: 2
Kudos: 50





	rage against the dying of the light

**Author's Note:**

> dedicated to isu @1117k_ on twt !!!

What was Atsumu but a big bag of dicks?

Perhaps there was more- there was definitely more to him, but that was how Atsumu liked to be perceived as; an asshole. Nothing more, nothing less. Whatever was hidden beneath his smirks and harsh comments to others, he kept it locked, he trampled on it until he made sure it was barely alive, barely breathing, barely there.

And he kept that up for fifteen years of his life.

That is until a man named Hinata Shouyou walked into his life.

More like fell to his side on a rainy afternoon, eyes cast down to the ground, voice shaking as he asked if he could stay the night in his one bedroom apartment. At that time, Shouyou didn’t even have a bag on him. Just his clothes, his shoes, and his phone in the pocket of his rain-soaked jacket.

Atsumu was a big bag of dicks but he wasn’t one to reject someone who looked like they were going to kill themselves if they were left alone a minute longer.

Atsumu led Shouyou inside his apartment, making a mental note to maybe mop the river of rainwater that followed Shouyou like some kind of curse. His hair was darker as it was damp, and his eyes were downcast with all the light gone from it. It made Atsumu uneasy. It made Atsumu feel like he needed to fix something.

“Shouyou-kun, why are ya here? Did somethin’ happen?” He asked, standing in front of the younger man. It felt more like trying to reach out to a wounded and confused animal; he felt like he needed to be prepared for any kind of outbursts or some kind of violent reaction.

But he got something worse.

Dead silence.

Atsumu had never dealt with a situation like that before in his life. So, of course, the logical thing to do was to offer his guest a glass of water.

Shouyou took the water and stared at it like there was something there. Like something he hated was there.

The sound of breaking glass echoed across Atsumu’s apartment.

“Fuck!” Shouyou’s voice was whole, it wasn’t rough or scratchy like Atsumu would expect it to be. But it sounded heavy like an indescribable weight had fallen onto him.

“Shouyou, what’s the matter? Where’s Tobio-”

Shouyou looked at him and Atsumu doesn’t consider himself easy to scare, but at that moment, there was a sense of dread that plummeted in his stomach when he saw the eyes of their outside hitter. “It doesn’t matter.” Shouyou closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened them again, all that rage was gone, just defeat. “Sorry, Atsumu-san. I-”

It was like looking at an oddly distorted mirror so Atsumu raised his hand up. “Just go wash up in the bathroom. I’ll clean this up.” He told Shouyou. “I’ll bring ya a change of clothes and a towel.”

The hesitation was clear in Shouyou’s eyes but he nodded anyway, slowly moving away from the fragments of broken glass on the wooden floor and the puddle that was slowly expanding from the place of impact. Then he just left with Atsumu looking at the mess on the floor and unspoken questions floating in the air.

As a child, Atsumu’s always loved the ocean.

There was no definite reason why. He just felt drawn to the sound of the waves lapping on the shoreline and the smell of the salty air that only got stronger the closer you got to the beach. It doesn’t matter that when he younger, he almost fell victim to a current and died in a place that brought comfort to him.

In fact, he was driving to the same beach that might have caused his time on earth come to a permanent halt at the age of eight.

Shouyou was sitting next to him, thumbs flying on his phone as he was messaging someone he met in Brazil. His former roommate, he said, showing a picture to a disinterested Atsumu.

There was no real reason as to why they were going to the beach. Shouyou just asked him one day to take him to a beach during one of their practices, about a week ago. It had been two months since he had shown up at his door unannounced.

Atsumu agreed for some reason and there they were, a week later stuck inside his car, bags tossed in the trunk with clothes that were good for three days and two nights.

However, the traffic caused them some hold up on their way to the coastal town and by the time they arrived at the inn they would be staying at, the sun was already beginning to set and there was no way Atsumu was going to swim in the dark.

“We’ll go swimming tomorrow then! We should also play beach volleyball while we’re here!” Shouyou told him as they walked to their room. Yes, their room. As in a singular room.

They could easily afford two rooms of their own but they agreed that sharing a room would be way more fun. For Atsumu, it reminded him of the times his family would pack up and squeeze into a single room during the holidays, laying futons on the floor, talking and playing board games until everyone was wiped out.

As Atsumu placed his bag inside the wardrobe next to his teammate’s, Shouyou was walking fiddling around with the tv in the living room, checking the remote on the ceiling fan, and opening the sliding doors that led to the balcony that overlooked the vast expanse of nothingness that they called the ocean.

Dinner was nothing special and a bit special at the same time. It was the birthday of the owner’s grandchild so she cooked enough food for everyone staying at the inn. In their room, there was _gyudon,_ _soba,_ _karaage,_ and matcha flavoured _mochi_. Before returning to their room with the two bottles of beer they were gifted, they had, of course, wished the celebrant a happy birthday and gave her their volleyball with their signatures on it as a gift, as she apparently was a big fan of the MSBY Black Jackals.

“I guess we can’t play volleyball tomorrow,” Shouyou said after finishing his meal.

Atsumu swallowed his food and frowned at him. “We can just buy a new ball. It’s not hard to find one,” he said.

For a moment, Atsumu could only hear the waves crashing against the shoreline, the memory of a younger him sneaking away from the room to hear it better. But for some reason, the longer he looked at Shouyou’s unwavering gaze, the louder the sound of the waves sounded in his ears, like a drum announcing the arrival of a funeral march.

Then Shouyou hummed in response and took the bottle opener, popped the cap off the bottle and drank the contents, still keeping his eyes locked on Atsumu, stare never wavering, eyes not blinking. The sight shook Atsumu, and his eyes flickered to Shouyou's throat and the bobbing of his adam's apple.

 _Intoxicating_.

Shouyou put the bottle down, eyes following his own hand before it snapped back at Atsumu with a clear question- no. A challenge.

And Atsumu, stubborn as always, was never one to back down to challenges.

Whatever they did that night, was left secret in the eyes of the moon.

As a child, Atsumu was always scarily perceptive of whatever was around him.

Whether it was a lie, the uneasy shift of the eyes, or fidgeting hands, Atsumu saw it. As a child, it brought unease to the people around him- especially his parents. By the time he was an adult, it was nothing but a helpful tool in his arsenal that allowed him to live his life in a safer way. Perhaps a more protected way.

For some reason, all this was thrown out the window when he dealt with Shouyou.

Shouyou was… an enigma.

His smiles were often real but there was an unshakable feeling to them that hinted that perhaps, not everything was what it seemed to be. There were times when Shouyou gazed at the sky a bit too much, with clouded eyes and pain that seemed to branch farther than Atsumu could see. And of course, there was the matter of Shouyou and whatever happened that rainy afternoon when he turned up at his doorstep with soaked clothes and some kind of anger that Atsumu later realised was never directed at Tobio at all.

Shouyou was sitting on his couch, reading a dog eared copy of One Piece, flipping through the pages after a few minutes. The sounds of the nightlife could barely be heard from Atsumu's apartment but it was still there, like a gentle, reassuring buzz that there was life outside.

"Shouyou, will ya spend the night?" Atsumu asked as he dried his hands on his shirt after washing the dishes.

Shouyou looked up at him, eyes gentle. "Can I?" He asked like he was always expecting a negative answer.

And like always, Atsumu lets him down. "Of course ya can."

Shouyou had his own space in his wardrobe now. Somehow, during the five month gap between the time they went to visit the beach and the present, Shouyou wedged himself into his life, slowly integrating himself in the routine Atsumu had made when he moved to Tokyo alone.

One day, he realised that there were two toothbrushes in his bathroom instead of one.

They went by their nightly routines, side by side, a steady beat of familiarity ebbing between them. When Atsumu was done, he climbed into his bed and waited for Shouyou to join him. He welcomed the weight of the younger man on his chest and in return, he slotted his fingers between Shouyou’s’ and held his hand.

There was that atmosphere of unspoken words again but at the same time, there was that world of calm Shouyou had so meticulously introduced into his life, like a sledgehammer against concrete. All Atsumu could do was wait for Shouyou to start talking or die in the silence and rot to waste.

“What is it?”

Atsumu raised his free hand and started running his fingers through Shouyou’s fiery orange hair. “I don’t know,” he said.

Shouyou peered up at him with those damned eyes that never told him anything. “Tell me.”

Something flickered in Atsumu’s head, a small section of a play his former school put up when he was just in middle school, where the man said something that led to his own demise.

“What am I?” Atsumu held Shouyou’s hand a bit tighter. “What are we?”

The silence went on for too long. Shouyou sat up and Atsumu followed, keeping his eyes trained on the man he had unknowingly let crash into his life.

“What do you want us to be?” Shouyou’s voice no longer held that warmth Atsumu had so furiously clung to. “What do _you_ want to be?”

Atsumu stood up from his bed and balled his fists. “You’re avoiding the question. Am I some kind of _rebound_?” He spat. “Am I some kind of fuck buddy ya come to so ya can fill that Tobio-less apartment ya own?”

Shouyou stood up and walked up to him, eyes blazing. “So we’re just going ignore that you liked-”

“What the fuck are you talking-”

“You liked Kageyama too.”

Outside, Atsumu could hear the faint sound of a car alarm going off.

Atsumu didn’t even have to tell Shouyou to leave.

Atsumu had always liked the truth.

He had always sought it out.

Whether if it was the sound of the waves that seemed louder at night or the pending separation of his parents, Atsumu found out. His penchant for uncovering the truth made him a blunt asshole in the eyes of many and that never changed. It trailed after him like smoke from a cigarette, and the smell would linger, and never fade.

As he looked at the vast expanse of the sky, the sun slowly rising in the horizon, an orange-haired man joined him, eyes clearer than it had been in months.

“Isn’t Tobio coming home today?” Atsumu asked, eyes flickering to Shouyou.

“Does is matter?” Shouyou asked.

“Don’t you love him?”

It had been roughly four months since Shouyou stormed out of his apartment and Atsumu was left alone with nothing but a room with too much.

It had been a month since they actually started talking again.

“I… it was just fate. But I’m not bound to that anymore,” Shouyou explained.

“Yer not making any sense, Shouyou,” Atsumu said, words light.

Shouyou blessed him with the sound of laughter and the warmth of his hands in his.

It felt like coming home.

“You’re the one who caught me, Atsumu. Don’t worry about it,” Atsumu faced Shouyou and brushed the younger man’s hair away from his eyes.

“Yeah. I’m here, Shouyou.”

As the sun finally reached its peak, two men were caught in an embrace. One that would become a constant in each other’s lives.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading the third and final instalment to my greek tragedy series! i hope i did their relationship justice as this is my first time even attempting atsuhina fdskfh
> 
> i'll be posting the second instalment to the series some time in the future so yeah this being the fourth instalment to the series is _not_ a mistake :D


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